This dissertation examines secrecy and information seeking within the experience of infidelity in romantic relationships. Infidelity, or a violation of a contract (stated or unstated) regarding emotion and/or sexual exclusivity, is a relatively pervasive phenomenon in both dating and married relationships. Infidelity is frequently marked by secrecy, deception, and discovery. This dissertation employed the Investment Model, the Revelation Risk Model, Theory of Motivated Information Management, and Awareness Contexts to further understand how people in varying roles (i.e., rover, partner, lover) experience infidelity.
Participants were recruited from various cities throughout the U.S., with different backgrounds and experiences with infidelity. Namely, participants who had experience as either the person who engaged in infidelity, the committed partner to the person who engaged in infidelity, or the person who was the third-party lover were invited to complete a survey. Each survey was unique to the aforementioned experience, though many questions were common among the surveys. This dissertation employed a concurrent nested mixed method design, with the intent of expansion in order to achieve greater breadth and depth. Quantitative data was analyzed using various statistical procedures. Qualitative data was transformed using content analysis and subsequently analyzed using nonparametric statistical tests.
Results support the various components of the Investment Model; specifically, as commitment to the partner decreases, commitment to the lover increases. Moreover, people who are more satisfied in their primary relationship are more likely to reveal the existence of a secondary relationship. Many participants reported that a crisis of some kind would facilitate disclosure of their infidelity, though a majority of participants indicated a friend as being the ultimate confidante. Furthermore, partners noted that suspicion was often triggered by the rover's withdrawal, which subsequently led to the partner's engagement in espionage-type behaviors. Finally, partners reported the desire to find the rover guilty of infidelity (i.e., once the partners began information seeking tactics).
This study introduces multiple voices in the experience of infidelity. The transformation of motivation, awareness, relational scripts, and a proposed process of infidelity are considered in the discussion. Implications, limitations, and directions for future research are also presented.